Process to Center

            I want to review again the process for dealing with any situation in your life where you want to make some changes or where Focker is stirring up things.

            1. Be curious. Conduct an inquiry.

            2. Fockers position (Thoughts, feelings, physical experience, behavior).

            3. Centered response to situation (Thoughts, feelings, physical experience, behavior).

            4. Skills needed to be Centered.

            5. Execution of skills to get Centered and stay Centered.

            To make that experience more powerful or to create new circuits in our brain, we change the way we think and then change the way we behave. Then it’s like we get in the habit of being Centered with that situation. The keys to getting there are the breathing and the training.

            In our list of group goals. We’ve covered a lot of them, but I don’t remember us talking specifically about, “find a reason to live” and “find a purpose for living.” I’m going to list our ideas on the traits at Center.

            Peaceful                Calm in the midst of a storm

            Loving                  Lives in the moment

            Accepting             Awake

            Compassionate     Open

            Non-judging          The observer

            Free                      Passionate

            Grateful                 Clarity

            Forgiving               Patient

            Joyful                    Curious

            Flexible                 Wise

            Attentive               Alert

            Again, whenever you’re working on one of your goals like finding a reason to live and a purpose for living, the answer can be found at Center. Some have said it seems overwhelming and impossible to live all those traits. A response to that challenge is to go back to being in the moment. That means taking one step at a time. If you take one step at a time, you can only be one thing on that sheet at a time. It means you have one situation at a time and one challenge at a time.

            We are talking about a purpose for living and a reason to live and that can cause us to get a long way from living in the moment. “Do you have meaning and purpose in your life and a reason to live?”

From the novel:

            Melinda: “I find it so easy to forget some things about being Centered. Living in the moment is one of the cornerstones at Center. I think remembering that answers a lot of questions and gives us a lot of help in defining our Center. How could I forget that?”

            Doc: “Because this is new to each one of you. Some things will be more challenging to remember than others. Personally, some of that will have to do with your Focker’s issues. She will work hard to make you forget what you’ve learned. Remember when we talked about resistance. Go back and review that from time to time and it will help you understand what might be getting in the way of your progress.”

            Chad: “That moment-to-moment living is starting to make more sense and it really helps me with the meaning and purpose in life issue. It is freeing to know that my meaning and purpose in life is to be Centered in each moment. So if someone in my life is doing something that hurts Focker or makes him mad, my purpose in that moment is acceptance or to be non-judgmental. In my next moment, my purpose might be to forgive that person, and my next moment after that might be to be patient with that person and on and on.”

            Jett: “Melinda mentioned that living in the moment is one of the cornerstones of Center. When I look at our group goals, another cornerstone would be the acceptance or non-judging that Chad just mentioned.”

            Rob: “So first, it’s livin’ in the moment. Then second, it’s acceptance of the moment.”

            Ace: “Those two cornerstones open a lot of Centered doors. Fark (Ace’s Focker) says, ‘Bout time pin head. I got that on the first day. That don’t mean it’s worth a shit.’ At ease Fark. Living in the moment releases us from the past and acceptance of right now frees us to find healing. Is it possible that all this is simpler than we imagined and that we’re making it more complicated than it is?”

                        *                      *                      *                      *                      *

            Living in the moment and acceptance are an important part of the foundation of the Centered state. They are both a challenge and one more time, the key to getting to Center and staying at Center is the breathing and the training. I want to ask you again, when will you be finished with the training?

            You will never be finished with the training. It is challenging now and I can promise you that it will be less challenging as time passes. Later on in your life, the overall training goal will be to stay attentive and focused in the moment. That will play a major role in helping you to get Centered and stay Centered. Yes, it does get easier and later on, you will find it’s something you look forward to as it becomes the reminder and the path to Centered living and the freedom to live those Centered traits.

            Remember, we will never be perfect and always be Centered, but as my family and friends say about me, “He’s a lot more Centered than he use to be.” 

            Remember, Center is not something you believe in. It’s an experience, a way of being in the world. Do not seek your Center in training. Just train and you will go there, to that deeper place which has been there all along.”

            Who else would volunteer to lead the Centering Meditation? (After someone leads the experience, group discussion)

            Some of you have mentioned that you have issues with God.